20 Divorce Do's and Don'ts

If you are considering or going through a divorce, it's important to know what to do – and what not to do.

Divorce can be a hard process, but following these 20 simple tips can help make it easier.

From divorce financial planning to understanding your legal rights, we will cover everything you need to know about getting through a divorce as smoothly as possible. So whether you are just starting the divorce planning process or have already begun proceedings, keep reading for the most important divorce tips!

DIVORCE DO'S

Prepare in advance

If you know divorce is on the horizon, start planning as soon as possible. This includes researching lawyers, understanding the divorce process, and gathering important documents.

Assess your financial realities

A divorce can have a major impact on your finances. Before you begin the process, take stock of your assets and debts and understand what you are entitled to. Considering the effects of divorce and your money is a crucial step. Check Divide & Thrive's planner page for an easy-to-use financial tool that help you during divorce, and your life beyond. 

Get a copy of your credit report

This will help you identify any joint accounts or debts that need to be dealt with during the divorce.

Know your financial rights and obligations

Each state has different laws when it comes to divorce and finances. Make sure you understand the laws in your state so you can make informed decisions about your case.

Make a budget

Once you know what your financial reality looks like, it's time to make a budget. This will help you during the divorce process and in the years to come. Not sure where to start? Check out Divide & Thrive’s monthly budget calculator. It comes with a detailed monthly expense breakdown so all you have to do is add in your numbers to get an accurate assessment of how much it costs to live your life. Just download, open, add your numbers and DONE! It’s that easy.

Understand your legal rights and options

Consult a qualified divorce planner or family law attorney to understand the ins and outs of divorce law in your state. This will help ensure you are making the best decisions for your unique situation.

Gather all important documents

This includes financial documents, like tax returns and bank statements, as well as any paperwork related to your property, custody arrangements, or prenuptial agreement.

Communicate with your spouse

If possible, try to have an open and honest conversation with your spouse about your divorce. This can help make the process less adversarial.

Address the emotional side of what you're going through

Divorce can be a very emotional time. Make sure to take care of yourself and find a supportive network of friends or professionals to help you through this tough time.

Get a divorce planner

Ok, we might be biased about this one but that's because we know it works! A digital divorce planner can make the process so easy by coaching you through how to gather important documents, which will result in you being able to make informed decisions about your case. This is an important step for things to go as smoothly as possible.

DIVORCE DONT'S

Assume someone else will be on top of the details of your life

In a divorce, both spouses need to be proactive in planning for their future.

Talk to your lawyer like a therapist

Your lawyer is not your therapist. Lawyers are divorce professionals. Save the venting for your friends or family members who can offer emotional support. They also won't charge you $$$ an hour.

Beat yourself up for past choices

We all make mistakes. Learn from them and move on.

Drain your joint accounts

If you have joint accounts with your spouse, resist the urge to empty them out. This will only make things more complicated and could come back to bite you later.

Hide assets

Not only is hiding assets illegal, but it will make the divorce process longer, messier, and more difficult.

Play the blame game

Blaming your spouse or yourself will only make the divorce process more difficult. Accept that the relationship is over and move on.

Badmouth your spouse to your children

Your children are going through a tough time as well. Divorce and kids will always be a challenge. Refrain from badmouthing your spouse to them or using them as pawns in the divorce.

Let emotions control you

Getting wrapped up in emotions can lead to rash decisions. Take a step back and think about what is best for you in the long run. This is a time for thoughtful decision-making. Avoid making any major life changes, such as selling your home or quitting your job, without first consulting a qualified divorce planner or family law attorney.

Neglect your own physical and emotional health

Taking care of yourself is crucial during a divorce. When it comes to divorce and women, it can be so easy to overlook self-care. Make sure to eat well, exercise, and get enough sleep.

Forget to update your will

If you have a will, be sure to update it after your divorce is final. This will ensure your assets are distributed according to your wishes.

Bonus Tip!

Don’t think you have to do it all yourself

A divorce is a lot of work, that's why we created the Divide & Thrive digital divorce planner. We've helped thousands of people throughout the U.S. and Canada save time and money, and have peace of mind during divorce.

Divorce is hard. Divide & Thrive makes planning for one easier. 

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